Elisabet Barnes is a coach, as well as a certified sexologist and relationship therapist. She is currently undertaking a PhD in Clinical Sexology at Modern Sex Therapy Institutes.
Elisabet loves helping people grow in confidence and create happier, healthier and more fulfilling lives. Combining her own life experience with professional, evidence based knowledge, she offers confidential, open-minded and judgement-free guidance for individuals, couples and poly-constellations. Elisabet welcomes all relationship types, sexual orientations, identities and kinks without judgement. A few of her interests:
Relationships & consensual non-monogamy
Elisabet believes that in a relationship you should be able to feel safe and valued, have open conversations with your partner(s), support each other, and help each other grow. You should be able to be your authentic self without criticism or judgement.
Whilst monogamy can be great for many people, it should not be the only socially acceptable template for relationships. There are many alternative formats which can work just as well, if not better. If you are specifically looking for a coach or therapist who is “poly friendly” you have one here.
Wellbeing for pleasure in sex and life
Elisabet is passionate about health and well-being in general and about helping people to a healthy lifestyle. How we feel in ourselves has much to say for how we function in daily life, in relationships, and for how much we desire and enjoy sex. Physical health is also important for sexual function. If you want to get help with lifestyle changes, Elisabet can assist you.
Relearning what pleasurable sex is
Due to lack of pleasure focused sex education and an abundance of low quality porn to fill the gap, many people grow up with distorted perceptions of what pleasurable sex actually is. Add to that that nobody really learned how to communicate about sex and that many (women especially) lack skills in asserting their wants and needs, and there can easily be misunderstandings and underwhelming sexual experiences.
Elisabet enjoys helping women to be more sexually assertive and confident in their bodies, ditching the shame that societal norms and cultural conditioning have burdened them with. Nobody can reasonably expect that a partner should be able to read their mind and “give pleasure” unless they have learnt what their partner likes. Because of this, you have to put yourself first and learn what is pleasurable for you. When you know what you want, and how to ask for it, then the magic can happen.
Cultural conditioning is causing many problems for people’s sex lives but the good news is that it can be changed through changing beliefs, learning new scripts, and communicating with your partner(s).
Normalising the “not normal”
Society teaches us a very narrow definition of what “normal” is when it comes to sexuality and sex. Because of that many people suffer unnecessarily for having a certain preference, kink, fetish or fantasy. It can be difficult to discuss with a partner because they may not have the knowledge and understanding to meet this information without fear or judgement. Variation is however entirely normal. Chances are if you are into something, other people are too. Elisabet is both educated and personally experienced in kink and BDSM, and can meet you non-judgmentally.
Elisabet is open to working with a wide range of topics but she is mainly focused on the above areas. Whilst she is trauma informed she does not work with trauma specifically. Additional areas of interest include supporting people who are rebuilding their lives after leaving abusive relationships, quitting alcohol, infidelity, dating & presentation on dating apps.
More about Elisabet
Elisabet had a successful career in management consulting when her father suddenly passed away in 2010. This was her wake-up call to make changes in her life. Wanting to live a more fulfilled and meaningful life she became a coach, entrepreneur and endurance runner. In running circles she is known for having won the gruelling 250km Marathon des Sables twice, amongst other extreme endurance events. Her personal and professional journeys then converged to lead her into sexology and couples therapy. This was driven by a realisation that many people settle for so much less than they can have sexually and relationally, and a strong desire to help people find more satisfaction in their sex-lives and relationships.
Elisabet was born and raised in Sweden, she has lived in Spain, the UK and currently resides in Norway. She is frequently travelling. For this reason, as well as for clients’ convenience, all sessions are on zoom. Elisabet welcomes clients who speak English, Swedish, or Norwegian (Danish and Spanish possible, see booking page).
Currently undertaking PhD in Clinical Sexology
Certified in Solution Building Couples Therapy
Certified Couples Therapist
Postgraduate Certificate in Change Management
Master of Science in Business Management & Engineering